Chillin’ on the stoop, waitin’ on that finale.
5 Pretzels, y’all.
Okay, so, I was wrong about Corey. He was not undercover coppin’ or clownin’. He was brought in for questioning by this Detective who will just not let it go. Look, I know it’s her job, but – and this is why I don’t work in law enforcement. Well, one of the reasons. The primary reason being that I hate working and will openly rebel if asked to wear a uniform – I don’t think I would give two craps about Perry being dead or how it happened. I would buy their weak little story because I’d want to and we’d all move on. Easy peas. But, you know, she’s actually doing her job.
Speaking of doing one’s job, Mary Louise’s attorney is digging real deep and hitting below the belt. Which is literally what Perry was doing when Bonnie shoved him so, again, I don’t care that he’s dead. At all. Celeste, all told, handled herself as well as can be expected. She’s putting that low, respectable ponytail to work. I did see the Detective clockin’ Bonnie during Celeste testimony, so I assume she’ll go after her first. Because she’s close to breaking anyway, in my opinion.
You know who else is dong their job, and even going above and beyond? Juliet. That’s who. Oooooh, girl. I’m really surprised Gordon got in the car with Renata.
So, everyone is on edge and I, for one, would like to place 99.9% of the blame on Mary Louise because she is a garbage person who raised a handsome monster. And, while I cannot wait to see what happens next week when she takes the stand, I hate that Jane confronted her the way she did. I get why she did it, but I hate that she did. Now I fear that, while she’s at it, what’s one more grandchild to rip away from their pretty capable mother?
Which brings us to Bonnie and her not so capable mother. First things first, girl. Burn that journal. Burn it. Then burn the ashes a second time just to be sure. And dump the ashes in the ocean. Because dopey ass Nathan will 100% find it and read it. You know he will. He’ll get to the part where she settled and be like, “But I bought you a treadmill…” because he is an idiot. And not even like one of those adorable idiots. Just a dolt. So Bonnie has officially confessed to someone she believes to be dying. We’ll see how that goes. If I had to guess, not well. I did, for a brief moment, think Nathan might be standing in the doorway and hear the settling part. Although, he’d probably just be like, “I didn’t know you’d been married before.” Because idiot. And then he’d go try to fight Ed for reasons known only to himself.
Oh, Eddie. Good ol’ steady Eddie. I like him and I want him to get away from Tori immediately.
So, that’s where we are. The ladies are all spiraling out of control.
I cannot wait to see how next week turns out. Hey, who knows, this season might also end with a dead husband. My money’s on Gordon. Renata is a maniac.
Okay, byeeeeeeeee.
Smoky Lynx
Holland + Harper Productions 