So, I’m changing it up a bit. Seven or eight episodes in one review caused me problems. I either have to short change some of the episodes, or I write a novella. So, I’m doing two a week. You can catch these reviews of a show that’s been out for roughly fifteen years every Monday and Thursday.
Let’s get into it, shall we?
Episode 201: It was Logan
“It was Logan” could also be the subtitle for all the bad stuff that happens in the show, but in this case, I’m referring to who was at the door. Last we saw him, he was hanging out on a bridge bein’ a fool. Well, turns out, he got more foolish and kicked Weevil in the face. Look, I’m relatively new here, but haven’t we all learned you don’t step to Weevil? He is the teenaged leader of a bike gang…who are all with him. Dang, Logan, make better choices. Turns out, he will not. More on that in episode two. So, Logan wakes up next to a dead Hispanic boy. He’s *almost* certain he didn’t stab him. Here’s the tricky thing about Logan, I also don’t think he stabbed Felix. However, is he *capable* of stabbing someone? Yep. So, it’s tricky. Anyway, Veronica is trying to comfort him and then he gets weird. Because Logan. Thankfully, the cute, charming, mildly creepy officer is there to help…and arrest Logan for murdering Felix. Whoa.
So, y’all, Veronica has had a summer. Logan is almost immediately found not guilty and released from jail. He and Veronica split, she gets a regular job while her dad “writes a book” about the Echolls case, and Veronica and Duncan get back together. It’s a lot.
While all this ^ is happening, there’s still school stuff. A lot of the starters for various sports ball teams have failed their drug tests and shall not be playing this year. Which sucks if you happen to be one of the kids in Neptune whose family works for the billionaires of Neptune rather than a billionaire family. No playing means no scholarship opportunities. So, V is on the case, mostly because Wallace is involved. Turns out, rich parents paid to have the tests falsified so their kids could start. Weird, extreme, pathetic. But, if Aunt Becky has taught us anything, it’s that your friends will like you whether you’re skinny or not and also she is willing to lie, cheat, and buy her kids’s way into college.
The episode ends with a field trip! Duncan suggests they all take a limo back to school because buses are for chumps…and poor people. Veronica stays behind because she keeps insisting on trying to talk to Meg about snatchin’ her man. Meg isn’t having it and, when the bus makes a quick stop and Veronica isn’t on it because she saw ghost Lily and ran into Weevil, Meg fails to tell the driver.
Veronica and Weevil are on shaky ground and he implies that he is, in fact, going to leave her behind, but – because he’s the best – he comes back to get her. They roll up on quite a scene. The bus has literally driven off a cliff and everyone but Meg is dead.
Episode 202: Too much, magic bus
We are somehow lucky enough to get baby Tessa Thompson and Charisma Carpenter in one episode. We don’t deserve this show.
Jackie (Tessa Thompson) is new at school. Here’s what I like about her: she walks into the restaurant where V works and, instead of politely standing there while Duncan and V have a discussion, she says something like, “I don’t care about your drama, just give me coffee.” I feel you, girl. I’m also here for the drama, but I do want coffee first. She also hates Pride & Prejudice.
Episode two highlights:
- Logan is sleeping with his friend’s step mom (Charisma Carpenter). I mean, congrats, dude.
- The quickie is selling bus crash memorabilia – gross and inappropriate – while also listening to Magic Bus – inappropriate and clever.
- While Veronica is helping a girl at school prove her father – the bus driver – did not commit suicide with a bus load of kids, a man washes ashore and the police find him.
- Dead men tell no tales…except this one. Because he has V’s name written on his hand in what I can only assume is the greatest Sharpie of all time.
Episode 203: The great escape
V is hired by Cassidy “Beaver” Casablancas to see if step mom is steppin’ out. She is. With Logan. So, V follows her around a bit and, in the process discovers it’s Logan and also that Daddy Dick is running some elaborate real estate scheme.
The man who washed ashore was named Curly McGee or something. Anyway, V finds out that he was an extra in an Aaron Echolls film. Of course Aaron is involved.
Keith Mars and Alicia are loving the published author life. He takes her to one of his events in Chicago. As they’re returning to their room, a man sees her and yells, “Cher” or maybe “Share.” Homophones are hard. He follows them, repeatedly calling her someone else’s name. She looks hella nervous. She and Keith get in the elevator and now I just wanna know who Wallace’s mom really is.
Back to the Dicks. Junior Dick and Beaver are pissed about Logan, but they’re going to be extra pissed when they discover the SEC is on route.
Daddy Dick is in his giant office when he finds out. He runs out of his office telling everyone to “Shred. Shred it all.” Then he goes to the roof and makes a dramatic helicopter escape. I have always wanted to make a helicopter escape, but I lack both the resources and the scandal.
Alright, Marshmallows, I’ll be back Thursday with more Veronica Mars.