Grounds for an Immediate Divorce

Ready or Not

4 Pretzels

Ready or Not had me from the second that I saw the trailer. I absolutely adore a good horror comedy and they aren’t the kinds of movies that get made very often these days so you know I’m going to go out and support them. This movie did not disappoint. I don’t want to give too much away because the twists and turns are the best part of any horror movie so I’ll just give you the basics.

Grace is super intimidated to marry into the La Domas family as they are stupid rich. The kind of stupid rich that lives in a ginormous mansion and have staff that are all forced to dress like matching 80’s supermodels and have absolutely no connection with the real world. These are all valid concerns but then on their wedding night her thoughtless a-hole of a new husband informs her that there’s a family tradition they have to get through before they can start their life together. At the stroke of midnight she has to play a randomly chosen game and then she’s a certified member of their family.

See, the La Domas family built their fortune through a board game empire. It wasn’t just moxie and a love of those little plastic spinners that made them a success. They also had some supernatural assistance. This makes hella sense because their games look absolutely terrifying and there’s no way anybody would agree to play a game called Family Ritual without mystical interference. Grace unfortunately draws the card for the most dangerous game-Parcheesi. Nah, she draws hide and seek. Which means that the family has until dawn to find and kill her. It’s a real raw deal but after a brief freak out she gets to hiding and the game is afoot, complete with a jaunty/creepy song played on a Victrola.

If you love a good scary movie I absolutely recommend that you go see it. It’s smart and funny and I got sucked into the tension of the hunt right away. It’s so, so fun and WAY gorier than I expected. Fair warning, I had to cover my eyes three separate times because this movie lingers on it’s bloody viscera the way that HGTV shows lovingly linger on granite countertops. Still though, it’s a great dark comedy and I had no idea where the story was going to take me which is a real rarity in this era of reboots. 

The cast is stellar, especially Samara Weaving who has to go from delightful smartass to Hunger Games contestant in less than an hour. Also, Aunt Helene who is absolutely batshit crazy. Nicky Guadagni plays her while serving the best mean mug I’ve seen since Grumpy Cat.

Do yourself a favor and get a crew together to go see this one on the big screen. You’ll laugh, you’ll jump, you’ll really reconsider if the institution of marriage is necessary.