Episode 213: Winter Wonderland Eleganza Extravaganza
Everyone is throwing all the shade at Jackie and absolutely everything is covered in glitter. Jackie is having a really hard time at school ever since her dad was questioned for causing the bus crash. Not heeding the warnings of one Madison Sinclair, Jackie makes an appearance at the Winter Carnival. She’s there just long enough for people to assume she stole twelve grand. Veronica is on the case!
Meanwhile, back at the office, Keith is working with Terrence to prove his innocence. Keith is a big baseball fan, so it’s kind of important to him to prove T’s innocence. Through the course of the episode, we learn that Terrence has a major gambling problem and he was also dating the journalism teacher who died in the crash.
The missing money is still missing and Madison is freaking out. She wants to go to Catalina for Senior trip. I assume because it’s the effin’ Catalina wine mixer. So, V is looking for the money and immediately hones in on Weevil who is there with his adorable niece. He is just the right amount of offended when V checks the little girl’s backpack. Much like Rosewood, PA, Neptune does not play around with its school events. The party must go on! Jackie finds herself in the dunk tank. All the kids line up to be awful to her and not a single adult does anything about. So, Wallace steps up. He “misses” by throwing the balls into the parking lot. That Wallace. I’m glad he’s back.
Some of the money is recovered, just enough that the seniors will get to go to Magic Mountain. And also Weevil rolls up in a new car the following day. But, like Veronica, we’re not going to dwell on it because we love him. Oh, and Logan meets a new girl, which will be important later.
Episode 214: Gimme Dat Pizza!
This is, frankly, an insane episode: someone is mugging Neptune’s finest pizza delivery boys, Logan is dating the daughter of the eye witness in his murder trial, Terrence is off the hook and then promptly on it again, and someone is blackmailing the queer students of Neptune High. Let’s start with the mugging.
The mugging story line crosses with the blackmail story line when one of the boys who is mugged tells Veronica he’s the leader of a queer student group. They have a message board where they can speak their mind, write poetry, express their feelings, and ask questions. It’s lovely, really. Except he kept a hard copy of all the members in his wallet. If Hermione Granger taught us anything it’s that, if you’re going to have a list like that, you need to curse it so that the person who reads it gets really gnarly acne. Obviously. He’s afraid the mugger is going to blackmail the kids on the list, which is exactly what happens. They are, in fact, being blackmailed. But by one of their own, which is really messed up.
V and Jackie take a road trip and find a bunch of explosives and detonators in Terrence’s hangar. Rut-Roh. Keith is not pleased. He goes to Lamb immediately and Terrence is brought in. He’s re-in trouble.
Logan uses his non-existent charms to woo the daughter of the man who claims to have seen him stab Felix. I feel like this is not going to end well.
Now I just want pizza.
Episode 215: You Don’t Deserve Tawny Kitaen!
Veronica is hired by Wallace’s new girlfriend to find her sister, Heidi. Heidi went missing after her bachelorette party. I hate the word bachelorette, so I’ll be calling it a hen party for the duration of this blog. And probably my life. I just like it better. So, Heidi has one heck of hen do and ghosts everyone. No one can find her. Thank the gods she has a fax machine in her ransacked, disheveled home. This woman who appears to not even own a hanger has a personal fax machine. She keeps it on the floor despite having a perfectly fine desk, but still. Anyway, V tracks her down based on a fax sent by her ex. Except he didn’t send it, her future father-in-law did. You see, he thinks his son is slummin’ it and, in order to get the precious heirloom ring back, he needs her to not show up to the wedding. She does. She walks away with no husband, a ring that will ensure she’s set for life, and a huge smile on her face.
Meanwhile, Beaver and Kendall are up to something that requires 1) Kendall to flash Aaron Echolls 2) Kendall to talk to Logan 3) Kendall to collect a Duncan Kane hair sample. Two of those things are weird, one of them is downright awful. I’ll let you decide which one.
Logan is mildly pouty because everyone hates him. But, in his own words he’s “done something terrible” so what does he expect?
And that’s where it ends. Logan telling us what we already know.